Wednesday, June 01, 2005

 

Camping with Irene

Sorry I've been gone, but I'm just now getting movement back in my body after "roughing it" in Irene's backyard.
Obviously, Irene and I made peace. I still think she has numerous old lady qualities and is stuck in a time warp, but whatever...that's what makes the world go round...plus, she promised she would teach me how to play bridge next week.

So, off we went to pitch our tent in Irene's backyard (and FYI: it was not a Red Tent). I knew when we arrived we were in over our heads. Irene, her husband, and her three boys are right out of the REI catalog. Their tent was bigger than a small house and could house approximately twenty-four campers. I saw that their tent was filled with their hearty, warm Eddie Bauer sleeping bags. In the meantime, Paul was busy dragging our collection of old blankets and pillows out of our car (only the best in camping gear for us!). Then Paul attempted to assemble our tiny, little, Kmart special tent...good God, what a scene that was! After watching him struggle with poles, snaps, hooks, etc., I told him Irene and I would finish the job. Which we did...expertly, I must admit...Now that the campsite was officially set up, it was time to relax. The kids ran about laughing...barefoot...enjoying nature...in the fresh, crisp, summer air...And the adults...well, we went inside to sit in chairs and drink wine. I was very responsible and refrained from drinking, as I knew someone had to keep their wits about them if we were to survive the night and it's elements outside...plus I have a peanut bladder and didn't want to keep getting up to urinate.

Anyhoo, after a delicious dinner and roasting marshmallows, it was time to retire to our tents...But first I had to convince Elizabeth that she REALLY needed to wear sweatpants to bed and NOT her Hello Kitty summer nightgown. Then, we had to have a twenty minute discussion deciding who was sleeping in what tent...With that solved, we were ready to hunker down for the night. The dads graciously said they would sleep with three children in the humongo tent and Irene and I would take one child with us in the pathetic tent (by the way, Irene wasn't so tough, as she snuck a lawn chair cushion under her sleeping bag). Surprisingly enough, the kids did well and went to sleep after twenty minutes or so...

The rest of the night is kind of a blur. I think hypothermia set in about 2:30 am, which will undoubtedly happen when one is only covered by an afghan blanket. After one of the longest nights of my life (after childbirth), I finally decided to get up at 5:30 am. I exited my tent and went to peek in the other tent...there slept my very masculine husband, wrapped up in a lovely, floral Laura Ashley comforter (who needs Coleman when you can look "pretty" when camping??). I later learned Paul, too, was suffering from hypothermia.

Anyhoo, we survived to blog about it...and when you've survived a true challenge like we all did, you come out stronger and more confident. And I am very confident I will NOT be doing that again anytime soon...

Comments:
No scenes from BLAZING SADDLES? No baked beans and farting around the camp fire? Flashlight stories, spooking the folks in the other tent, escaping the yard to toilet paper a friends house? Are you all overdosed on Geritol? --MUSH
 
No cozy renditions of 'Kumbaya', or even a game of duck-duck-goose, huh?
 
Note to MUSH: Remember, I WAS with Irene...and yes, we did have one Blazing Saddle explosion due to Irene's bean salad. I will refrain from naming the guilty party, but let's just say that Laura Ashley would be disgusted!
 
And remember campers, only you can prevent forest fires!
 
Sounds like some all American fun on an all American holiday. Were s'mores involved or just marshmallows and bean salad?
 
so Paul can't Pitch a Tent? You didn't give him the come and get me eyes!
 
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