Suburban Warrior

Everytime I turn around I see something booger related.

Today, I'm sitting at a red light and I look over at the driver next to me. Clear as day, I can see him diggin to China up his nose. Its one thing to sneak a pick while your vehicle is moving, but when you're stationary?? How very arrogant. I keep my gaze on him, as I want to humiliate him when he catches me staring at him (I obviously have not put the heshe incident from Starbucks behind me). No luck, as the light turns green...but you know how determined Suburban Warrior is! I am now speeding, changing lanes, risking life and limb...all this simply to catch up to the picker and see if he is still hard at work...But when my daughter says, "Mommy SLOW DOWN!" I stop the chase. Defeated I mumble to myself, "we'll meet again, gross little man...another day, another road, but mark my words, we WILL meet again..." (although he'll probably give himself a brain aneurysm before I see him again...).

It wouldn't be so bad except for the fact that I am constantly battling boogers in my own home as well. My daughter would rather walk 20 feet PAST the tissue box to smear her boogers on our family room couch. And don't even get me started on what the wall next to her bed looks like! Oh, and Elizabeth doesn't limit herself to sticking her boogers on inanimate objects...oh no, my husband and I have, on more than one occasion, found her "stickies" on our own bodies, as well as our coats, pants, socks, pillows, etc. Yes, I know most kids go through this, but it is still disgusting. My nephew, Jack, went through a stage where he would pick his nose, roll up his booger, place it on the tip of his pointer finger, show it to you and simply say, "lighthouse". Okaaaaaaayyyy...

Well, at least they're not eating their boogers...