Suburban Warrior

I haven't been to the gym all week and my stomach is touching Guam.

My kid's behavior has been atrocious the last few days and that ALWAYS drives me to gorge. After one of her "episodes" I will basically eat anything that doesn't eat me first. In my house, 1 TEMPER TANTRUM=1 TUBE OF PRINGLES. Why is it that after an episode I immediately, and I mean immediately, head to the pantry and find something with sugar to throw down my throat? Why don't I trot over to the treadmill and run a few miles? God, if I took that approach I would weigh about 85 pounds.

And this gluttony can get very embarrassing...before Christmas my mother-in-law gave our family a gingerbread kit to make together. Isn't that a sweet idea...quality family time during the holidays...we could put on some Frank Sinatra Christmas cd's, drink cocoa, work on the gingerbread house and make Christmas memories together. This could be a tradition for our little family. Well...it COULD have been a tradition...had Mommy not gone hog wild and attacked the poor, innocent gingerbread house!! With the stress of Christmas, I began eating the house piece by piece out of the box. First the roof, then the walls, and finally the best part, the gummy decorations. And this was no dinky gingerbread house, it was more like a gingerbread estate and I easily devoured the entire thing in 2 nights. Thank God my daughter is still young enough that I can make ridiculous excuses to explain the disappearance of the gingerbread house..."gee, I dunno know where the house is honey, its a mystery to me, too...probably Daddy or the Boogieman ate it while you were sleeping". And I wonder why I have IBS. I made my husband swear he wouldn't tell his mother, but I could see her eyeballing my kitchen looking for the damn house when she came over for Christmas.

Anyhoo...I am going to the gym tomorrow...Now where the hell did my husband hide my daughter's Valentine's Day candy??????